Sunday, April 27, 2014

The Morning After

Sorry if the post title is misleading.  From the sound of it, you might have thought this would be a good, juicy read.  Alas, this is not about the aftermath of a good, hard spanking.  Rather, it's about how I feel today, after having gone to bed at 3 am (Kane let me sleep in until 10:30).  I woke up feeling well rested, and when my thoughts became coherent, I remembered the post I wrote last night.  I wondered if it was too down, too heavy....maybe I shouldn't have hit 'publish'.  I considered whether I should take it down.

After (finally) getting out of bed and greeting my youngest child, I slowly became aware that I was feeling better, even lighter.  I can't attribute it to a spanking, because no spanking of any kind took place last night, let alone a hard one.  For one thing, Kane was fast asleep, snoring away.  For another thing, I did NOT want to experience the kind of pain I wrote about at that ungodly hour.  I told you I'm a

I find my days are like this lately.  With the conclusion that Kane and I have arrived at looming in the not-so-far distance, my emotions have run the gamut of the spectrum.  Sometimes when I can't sleep, Kane will allow me to fall asleep on the couch to the TV.  It's a helpful distraction.  That was the case a few nights ago when I couldn't turn my thoughts off, as I worried about the kids.  Kane and I had been talking things through for at least an hour by that point, and then when I tried settle enough for sleep, it wouldn't happen.

This morning I feel an 'odd' sense of peace.  I welcome it, believe me.  I don't fool myself that I won't find myself at the opposite end of the spectrum many times again going forward, but I am hanging onto the belief that eventually, this peace will grow and last.  That is what the peace that surpasses all understanding is.

The events of the past year have been, what some people have told us, unimaginable, and enough to send most people over the edge.  My doctor put me on medication last fall.  I thank God for my wonderful husband, who is also struggling right alongside me.  He's been my rock, yet of course, he has also experienced each and every emotion I have.  We reach out to each other for comfort.  The other day he surprised me with a DVD of one of my favorite comediennes, Carol Burnett.  We watched it that night and had ourselves some good laughs, mixed in with a nice feeling of nostalgia.

I've decided I'm going to enjoy this peaceful, lighter feeling I have today.  Thank you all for your reassurance that I'm not being a Debby Downer.  I do not write here for sympathy, and I'm so glad you know that.

I'd like to end this post on a lighter and brighter note, so I dug around for a few pics that might express just that. 

Kane's been into woodworking lately and has been making some really awesome stuff, and although it would require something other than woodworking to achieve this, I'm thinking of asking him to try his hand at inventing something like this.  Who knows?  He's completely self-taught on the woodworking thing.  Anything's possible, right?  At the very least, a girl can dream......

While he's at it, maybe he can make me one of these, too.

This is me far more often than I'd care to admit.  I don't know if Kane can do anything about this.  *Sigh*

OK, how many of you are old enough to remember what TV show this is from?

I chose it because I think it humorously captures the spirit we'd like to aspire to, at least every once in a

And, on the flip side, back to reality once again!  On these days, I just keep telling myself, "This too shall pass".

Have a great Sunday, everybody  :D


  1. Hey Sadie...for some reason your last few posts didn't show up on my reading list until today...and then they showed up together! So I'll just leave one comment here.

    You and Kane are going through such a rough time...what I really admire and commend both of you for is that you are turning TO each other rather than ON each other as so many couples do when they hit rough times. I can't even begin to imagine myself in your place but know there are times that you just need to spew, vent, get it out! Does that make you a Debbie Downer/Negative Nellie/Sobbing Sally? Not at all...that makes you human. This is your blog and if it helps you and your family for you to write your feelings it!

    Oh and you little stinker...that's the Donna Reed show. ;)

    Sending lots of prayers and positive energy.

    Hugs and Blessings...

    1. Ding Ding Ding Ding ....... CORRECT!!! Congratulations, Cat :D

      Thank you so much for your support. I'd never heard of 'Sobbing Sally'

      Hugs and Blessings right back atcha,


  2. Sadie, I am sorry about your bad night, these times really suck. But I loved reading that Kane let you sleep so long and that it helped you to feel better. I am so sure that Kane is your rock, and that’s lovely. Especially in times of sorrow, it is so important to have a loving partner who can give you support. He might need that as well from you, but having this special loved one is what makes many things endurable. And it is so good that you are feeling better again.
    Oh, if Kane ever invents this mirror, I’d like one of those, too.:)I don’t know which tv show this is, but I like the style of fashion. I hope you enjoy a lovely, lazy Sunday with lots of hugs and kisses from Kane. Hugs and kisses are always a feel-good guarantee.



    1. Oh, Nina, something tells me you're young enough to be my Cat was right; the name of the show was The Donna Reed Show. Maybe you can google it!

      Kane is and has been my rock throughout all of this. Sunday turned out great. I hope you had a great weekend :)


  3. Those are some great pics, very funny. Thanks for the laugh. :)

    As for the serious stuff, I'm so happy to read that Kane has been such a rock for you. It's so nice when you find that person that just makes you feel better. The person you can lean on. It's wonderful that you have that.

    Now go enjoy that peaceful feeling. :)